A Novel – In One Page Per Day
Day 191, Tuesday
July 10th, 2017
Chapter Two: Valued
Kathy felt the artificiality of her life, some days it weighed on her. When she was busy she hardly noticed.
In her work place, every little detail of her environment was contrived, scripted, fake. The lighting, the view, the temperature, the sounds and smells, her handlers put everything in place like they were scripting a television show.
Their aim was to keep Kathy passive, and somewhat distracted.
No effort was spared to engender within Kathy feelings of safety, and love.
They would introduce something into her environment, a painting, a vase, a lamp, then they would measure its effect on her output, her vital signs and expressions of her well-being, both voluntary and involuntary.
Kathy saw through all of the contrivances made on her behalf. At the same time, she valued the sentiments behind them, as artificial as they were. She accepted those things at face value and took them for genuine.
She was able to maintain that peaceful coexistence with her handlers for many years, and through her young adulthood. In that time she wanted to believe that the people she met had good intentions.
Over time however, all the false fronts vanished.
Kathy became cynical.
As she grew older her cynicism did not cause her to lash out. She was quiet and focused about it. She preferred, as all cynics and pessimists do, to think of herself as a realist.
She stopped wanting to believe that people had her best intentions in mind, she did not want their kindness or sympathy even when it was genuine. She knew that she was an asset, a tool, and an unceasing object of fascination.
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