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Tuesday, April 23, 2019

Self-Analysis


Crawling the walls inside my head, scratching
At the barriers in my mind, feeding my anxieties, unwittingly
The beast that presses in on me
There is decay, the stink of it is everywhere
Leaves molding in the compost heap, the off gassing of self-analysis
Full of rot and decay, the trappings of entropy
Self-diminishment, pursuing the illusion to oblivion  
An equation for the will, spiraling malaise, the slow poison of fear
Paralyzed by trepidation, lost in the labyrinth
There are mirrored halls and corridors, stretching
Forever, each plane is a door, locked and forbidden, I am keyless
But I have a hammer, and am crashing through the void
Digging in the earth with Leibniz
Plum the mysteries of my secret world, caught in the reflection
Of the present, like Enkidu in the wild
Adrift on a sea of confusion, as Gilgamesh drowning
Caught in time, trapped in space, always subject to flooding tides
Beneath the black skies on a starless night
I have forgotten the moon, lingering too long in limbo
At the brink of despair, the pit of uncertainty, the abyss is whispering
I am deaf to it, I was never taught to listen
There is a language to the soul, it is universal, sounding
Down the pathway of my heart, the echoes of reason beat my bones to dust
The destroyer comes with songs of praise
Cleverness is no substitute for, genius we paint our demons
In a bright colors, the infinite palate Leibniz says, and we dance
In the shadows of the ego, falsafah, the flowage of dreams
My Id crawls over me, like a worm that never dies
The compulsion to fail, as it swallows its tail, the serpent of Midgard
Kali comes riding with her pack of dogs, each one a cynic
            Barking with spite

            Philosopher solve thyself

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