Week 29, 2019
Kathy journeyed inside herself, reliving lifetimes through her memories.
She experienced the lives of her ancestors in quantum time, which was not time at all, it was outside of time, it was no-time.
In that mysterious space she communed with her ancestors and under their tutelage she mastered all of the disciplines she required to control her abilities, learning from them a way that allowed her to function in society.
She wanted to be a normal person, to experience normal things, to feel the weather, or human touch, to see the beauty of the world and of humanity, to listen to music, and the sounds of the city, to smell flowers and food cooking, and the bodies of her lovers.
She wanted those things for herself, she wanted more than to just relive them through her intimate connection to the past.
She developed austere habits and disciplines in order to possess muscle control, discernment and patience.
She developed the ability to flesh out the memories she wandered in, to experience them for herself as if she were truly living in them.
There was no path too remote for her to follow.
She took up the plastic arts, she drew and painted, she sculpted.
She took the time to recreate the visions of her ancestors, and to capture through various media, her own unique experience.
Of all the “normal” things that people occupied themselves with, the ordinary pleasantries and little things that filled up their days and nights, music was the most difficult thing for Kathy to endure.
There were new generations of performers emerging all the time.
Every year brought new waves of artists writing songs, and making hits. Vocal styles changed, tonal styles changed, the content of lyrics and the popularity of certain instruments changed, but only within a narrow range.
The rhythm and the beats, the timing of the drums changed even less over time.
If Kathy was careless a melody could cause her to slip, without knowing, into another lifetime. She would fall into her memories, slipping away from the present in ways that were dangerous to her
A beating drum told a hundred thousand stories; they told of the hunt and the harvest, of conflict and the march to war, of years toiling in servitude pushing through the field and pulling at the oar.
Kathy loved music, she would use it for all of those purposes, but her susceptibility to it made it dangerous to her.
It was an area of weakness.
Her handlers knew this.
They had observed the effects of music and other sensory stimulants on her, enough for them to see the patterns, learning enough about Kathy’s relationship to certain stimuli that they could use it to manipulate her.
When Kathy danced she moved without thinking.
Dancing was auto-hypnotic. She lost herself in the drums and rhythms.
She abandoned time in movement, in the moments flowing from the present to past ages.
She relived the steps of her ancestors, felt their feelings, both their fears and their hopes for the future.
Dance was a place of transcendence.
When she was dancing she was not fully engaged with the present world, the psychic noise and the din of chaos slipped away, the cares of the world disappeared, and she was vulnerable.
Kathy experienced this same phenomenon in many ways, but what made dancing different for Kathy was that while dancing she did not succumb to the temptation to retreat into no-time.
She hovered in between the world of the present moment, and the world of her ancestors, simultaneously connected to each.
With her body in motion, she could not fully disengage from the world around her, and at the same instant she was connected to both the world of her memories and the collective consciousness that joined her to the entirety of humanity.
Dancing was freedom.
Dancing was the ultimate expression of who she was, of her uniqueness as a human being.
Kathy danced for the joy of it.
Eating was a necessity, there were many days when she wished she could dispense with her diet altogether.
The rituals of cooking, the textures of food, brought her to places she did not want to dwell in. Not that the memories were unpleasant, that was not necessarily so, but she could not avoid the nexus of memories those activities brought her to.
What bothered Kathy was the lack of control.
Flavors and odors haunted her, they hovered around and clung to her like ghosts.
Taste and smell could transported her instantly to past times and past ages, placing her unbidden, into a kind fuge, one she should not escape from.
Kathy found solace in the bland, comfort in modern processed foods, foods that were completely new and entirely foreign to human experience.
She did not want to mix anything in a bowl, stir something in a pot, engage in knife work, or butchery.
Even the smell of baking bread, so pleasing and comforting to almost every person in the world, even that was troublesome for Kathy.
Eating was a necessity.
Kathy consumed most of her calories like an astronaut, sucking it out of packages that did not require any processing.
Nevertheless, of all the foods and drinks she imbibed, the most pleasing thing to her was coffee.
After years of working with Kathy, her handlers came to an appreciation of how dangerous it could be to interact with her directly regarding the nations secrets.
She could penetrate the minds of anyone who came in contact with her. This happened without effort in regard to those who near to her, either close to her emotionally, or proximate to her in space. The content of their thoughts might pass through her as if she were sifting fine particles from the air.
In spite of her generalized feelings of alienation from society, the empirical fact of her interconnectedness to other human beings spoke to her of her belonging.
She was one with humanity as they were with her. The thought comforted her.
Her handlers determined to engage her at a distance. The efforts they took in this regard had a positive impact on Kathy’s life. Everything about her circumstances was completely contrived, this much she knew. They represented the efforts her handlers took to allow her to live a semblance of a normal life.
There were some in the security establishment who argued that she should be killed, that she was too dangerous, and that it was too costly to keep her in the world.
There were powers at the top of the hierarchy who would not hear these recommendations, they argued two things; first, that Kathy was the most prodigious problem solver and analyst the world had ever seen; and second, that they needed to study every aspect of her abilities so that they could document the full range of human potential
Kathy was placed in a small-private college, she did research, and wrote.
She became an academic.
It was a comfortable environment, quaint, aesthetic.
Her work was recognized and this filled with pride. She enjoyed the esteem of her colleagues.
Her handlers thought that distance, and noise were the keys to protecting their secrets, believing that the more people they placed between Kathy and themselves the more likely it would be that they could shield their intentions and motivations from her
They were wrong, there were few limits to Kathy’s abilities.
Out of an innate drive for self-preservation, Kathy developed the ability to ward off psychic intrusions.
She built mental walls to ensure her privacy, to keep the thoughts and feelings of other people from seeping into her cognitive flow.
As her mastery over her powers grew she also had to be careful not to project her wishes and desires onto other people. No one knew it, not even one of her handlers suspected this, but she had the ability to control the thoughts of other people, to audit their memories, to make suggestions that they were powerless to refuse.
She wanted privacy, and she had no desire to influence people. The boundaries she established for herself were crucial to preserving her sense of identity.
Those defenses required constant mindfulness, a diligence that stole her energy. And so, in order to rest, she preferred to be alone.
She was a recluse.
For Kathy, being alone was not enough, she also had to be distracted, her senses needed to be stimulated all the time, or else she would slip into the nous-sphere, float in the cynergenic field, or find herself caught up in the labyrinth of her memories.
Kathy desired little more than to be present, to be helpful, to advance the causes she cared about; diplomacy, justice, care for the environment and the safeguarding of the human race.
She was increasingly focused on the long range plans to establish a permanent human presence in space, on the moon, and toward the outer planets.
She dreamed of a life out among the stars, in those dreams she encountered a thread that pulled at her consciousness like the threads of her ancestral memories.
She heard a calling that awakened her to a sense of purpose, and with that purpose she was able to direct her energy toward the realization of her potential.
Kathy began to experience a degree of freedom she had never enjoyed before. She knew that it was entirely conditional. At all times her handlers wanted Kathy close to them, under strict observation.
The apparatus they built around her was an amazing thing to behold.
The National Security interests utilized a revolving network of spies to keep an eye on her. Every agent was linked by satellite, it gave them the ability to track her comings and goings in real time and from a distance which they felt was sufficiently safe from her prying mind.
Those agents whose mission it was to keep their eyes on her, they had no idea who she was.
They were junior agents who came and went so quickly from their assignment, that following Kathy was generally viewed as a basic training exercise. Nevertheless, every observation they made was pushed up into the cloud and correlated with the vast data base that her handlers were building to track everything she said and did.
Kathy felt her autonomy increasing.
Every little bit of space they gave her, she took.
The assignments she was given came less and less frequently. She could see the patterns in their behaviors toward her.
She knew that she was both indispensable and a matter of grave concern for the people at the top of the security apparatus.
In time, she even had some freedom to travel.
When she did, she went to the places that her ancestors directed her to.
Part Four, Kathy
Chapter Twenty-seven, Isolated
A Novel – In One Chapter Per Week
#Emergence #ShortFiction #365SciFi #OneChapterPerWeek
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